Wednesday, April 30, 2008

i feel like being rebellious now and not sudy ):<

i want to complain bout so many things! its okay if you cant tolerate you can just leave this blog (:

FIRST, i missed the annual b&j's free cone day because i had csp test which ended so freaking late. i only reached home near EIGHT.

SECOND, emath, ss, bio and csp are all EQUALLY HORRID. like i totally totally screwed them up. im rly not kidding (the only not screwed paper is LIT and well, lit's nvr rly been screwed anyway. whichever way you turn, its kinda hard to fail lit.)

THIRD, the weather's been so freaking hot lately and i keep perspiring! STUPID. then the hall will be freezing cold. totally bad for my health dude.

FOURTH, alot of ppl are using my phone now! i dont mean to make it sound like im spoilt or anth of that sort (which i am not obviously) but its rly annoying to just turn ANYWHERE in the train and see AT LEAST ONE person using the same phone (maybe diff colour) like i first bought it cause at that time i've seen NOONE using it. GRRR. AND the same thing happened too, to my old phone ):<

FIFTH, alot of my fav songs are starting to play on radio! okay this makes me sound a bit spoilt too (so not) but its rly annoying. like suddenly everyone starts listening to it, it becomes so overrated and you just suddenly lose that special touch with the song ): but ahwell. been wanting to rant bout that since forever. annoying pls.

SIX, my tolerance is rly wearing thin. i refuse to elaborate on this. ):<

SEVEN, i rly cant stand the idea of living beside a house full of ghosts okay. its rly scary and creepy and freaky esp whenever i come home after nine. drives me crazy whenever i have to pass by the house. GAH GAH GAHHHHHHH.

EIGHT, 2 other girls in sch are now using the same bag as me!! ahhh its so annoying. but thank god my bag's gonna be spoilt soon (dont ask how). so that gives me a reason to get a new bag (:

okay im done complaining (: (for now)
i was high on apples today. god so weird. i kept going back to buy the apples even the stall auntie questioned me.

i had 3 dreams yest night, and many random ppl appeared in it! of course man, 2 out of the 3 dreams were scenes in sch :/
yep. sch's haunting me THAT MUCH.
-

idk if its just me or just a fragment of my imagination.
but its rly horrible.
you dont know what im talking about.
you dont know even know im talking bout you.
it'll be a miracle if you do end up here reading this.
but i could pretend that miracles happen not only in fairytales right?

-
okay i should've warned you. stress makes me either high or emo. only those two.

OH YEAH. GUESS WHO I HAD TO UNLUCKILY SIT BESIDE DURING HMT PAPER2 JUST NOW! :0 urgh i purposely moved my table closer to rayhanah's and it was out of line but i dont care. i dont need such distraction tyvm. HAH i knew it, i've always had this feeling smth will happen to make me not like her, ever since the first day i saw her. (omg!! i accidenally put rayhanah's name as rihanna. LOL)

IM IN DESPERATE NEED OF A NEW BAG, A GOOD NEW EARPIECE, A PROPER ORGANIZER, NEW CLOTHES, A NEW HOUSE, A FUNCTIONING BRAIN AND SLEEEEEEEEEP!

okay. i typed all those in an hour and managed to cover almost all of my chem topics. im a happy mugging multi-tasker (:

omg i just wanna add one last thing. I HAVE A SUPER WEIRD MUM! she's in her room, just next door, and she just called me on my HANDPHONE just to remind me not to sleep too late and to switch off the lights before i sleep. and that she'll call me again before i sleep. OH GOD my mum's so weird.

xoxo
hanisah

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8:08 AM

Saturday, April 26, 2008

so far, the mids has been disastrous.
mly paper one was utter crap. i spent 15 mins just to think up of the content for both parts.
el paper one confused me so bad i just stared at the paper for 10 whole mins, trying to figure out the actual meaning and thinking up of a plot, which still turned out to be very boring in the end.
then the worst part was the speech, because me (and many others too) didnt realise/rmb that there's a back page, thus, we did not include those impt points in. ALAMAKKK.
i felt like crying until i got a great big hug and a big happy high five from SH after she told me that the same exact thing happened to her too, which actually did make me feel better (:

okay yay, 4 papers down, 14 more to gooooooo! WE CAN DO IT BABY! :D

oh. me and raihan were reminiscing bout the good ol' days, our previous higher mly class. that part nearly escaped from my memory. suddenly makes me feel like running back to those days.

my papers are not over but...

I FEEL LIKE PARTYING!!!!

xoxo
hanisah

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8:04 AM

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

i cried
i became angry
only because i cared
only because i loved
if i were to die tomorrow
from choking on my tears
or maybe just by heaven's will,
i'll die with a thousand regrets.

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7:38 AM

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Kau Ilhamku

Beribu bintang dilangit
Kini menghilang
Meraba aku dalam kelam
Rembulan mengambang
Kini makin suram
Pudar ilhamku tanpa arah

Sedetik wajahmu muncul
Dalam diam
Ada kerdipan ada sinar
Itukah bintang ataupun rembulan
Terima kasih kuucapkan

Izinkan kumencuri bayangan wajahmu
Izinkan ku mencuri khayalan denganmu
Maafkanlah oh...
Andai lagu ini
Mengganggu ruangan hidupmu
Kau senyumlah oh...
Sekadar memori
Kita di arena ini
KAU ILHAMKU.

if its alr gone, why do i still behave and feel this way?
you know, sometimes i dont understand myself at all.
i hate it when ppl jump to conclusions.
cause i dont even understand myself, what more about you?

Fall For You

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a ~~girl~~ like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you i'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start

Ohhhh
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a ~~girl~~ like you is impossible to find
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a ~~girl~~ like you is impossible to find
Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a ~~girl~~ like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

Maybe

Didn't you want to hear
The sound of all the places we could go
Do you fear
The expressions on the faces we don't know
It's a cold hard road when you wake up
And I don't think that I
Have the strength to let you go

Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe
That everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving
And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face
Makes me wish that I was never brought into this place

There goes my ring
It might as well have been shattered
And I'm here to sing
About the things that mattered
About the things that made us feel alive for oh so long
About the things that kept you on my side when I was wrong

Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe
That everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving
And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face
Makes me wish that I was never brought into this place

And someday, I promise I'll be gone
And someday, I might even sing this song
To you
I might even sing this song, to you
And I was crying alone tonight
And I was wasting all of my life just thinking of you
So just come back we'll make it better
So Just come back I'll make it
Better than it ever was

Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe
That everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving
And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face
Makes me wish that I was never brought into this place
Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe
That everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving
And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face
Makes me wish that I was never brought into this place
(I want it all, Don't leave right now)
(I'll give you everything)

is it still okay, if i were to tell you the truth now?
im sorry but i cant run away from the fact tt its bothering me.
its okay if things go wrong. but you know how selfish i am.
i want everything but want to lose nothing.
i dont dare to turn, cause if i do, you'll look into my eyes and you'll just uncover the truth.
insane, absurd.

xoxo
hanisah

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7:39 AM

Saturday, April 19, 2008

yayy im finally gonna blog nownownow!

its kinda late but since not many have blogged abt it, i shall talk bout the I Am Gifted thingy.
it was a-w-e-s-o-m-e! first day, laughed so hard i cant recall when was the last time i laughed so much in a day.
second day was damnnnn emo HAHA the first time a stranger actually made meus CRY okay. but it was rly damn emotional.
third day was great too. agn it was quite an emo day too but not as bad. even SuperHero cried okay! :0
my parents should've come but ohwell. kudos to those who were rly brave enough to go up and make the speech, rly awesomely brave ppl.
so overall, the whole thing was rly awesome. NOT BAD food, good lemon biscuits, good entertainment, good lessons, good strategies, good facees (LOL), good company.
if i could, i would do it all over again.

yest was beautiful sky day! train was weirdly super late so everyone was late BUT there was a super pretty rainbow! :D
and the sky was just so beautiful throughout the day.
had night study and agn it was AWESOME! hahaha the company is perfect, although no siti and no raihan. (but a slight change is still awesome!) fried rice sucks but brenda claimed its nice (tt's why we took it). that AMR influenced the rest by making them convinced tt im crazy! D:

today had unofficial ymc graduation planning! ended up with only 5 of us coming, but raihan left 1/2 way so only ended up with 4 of us. that spells pathetic. but nvm, we're the awesomest yo! :D

err yeah thats it i guess. had alot of tests this week. 7=madness.
next week mids! good luck everyone! *lovelove*

my mum made a good deal with me IF (if ah, if) i can get 5 points for O's. TOTALLY NO COMMENTS.

and this week, i learnt smth new bout myself! (HAHA)
that is, if i give up(in anything at all), there's only 2 reasons why.
1.) i totally lost interest.
2.) i know its not possible/no hope. (dont try telling me 'nothing is impossible'. be realistic dude, there's so many things tts rly rly impossible in this world)
haha so there! came to this conclusion when i was studying for bio test -.-

ok im off now. doubt i can find the time to blog, till after mids. ):
AND the sch's turning us into pandas D:

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
8:07 AM

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

reflect. sit down and think.

i have some things to update on but i rly rly cant find the time. this weekend, i must. or it'll just escape from my memory.

"One day you will ask me which is more important?
My life or yours?
I will say mine.
And you will walk away, not knowing you are my life."

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
8:35 AM

Monday, April 07, 2008

horoscope

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KHALIE(and twin)! :D
yaye. i love my fated friend (:

hello world. i know, this post is so redundant and i should be mugging for my chem mock tmr. but. this horoscope thing, is quite disturbing to me. as much as i know tt it is against my faith to actually believe in horoscopes, i can never deny that they are true 99% of the time. check out mine today:

The Bottom Line
Don't believe the stories you're hearing about someone. And don't pass them on.

In Detail
Do not believe all the juicy stories you are hearing about someone right now. They might be awfully entertaining, but they are also not true. You don't usually believe everything you hear without question, so why start believing now? Think about how you would feel if it were you who were the subject of such gossip. Apply some real empathy to this situation. The next time someone tries to use you to spread this type of story around, don't pass it on. Make it stop with you.

haha does that sound familiar?

i tried looking. but you seem so far away. so near, yet so far away.
if one day you were to know, know the truth.
would you hate me for who i am?
or would you love me and cherish me more for that?
would you push me away, push me to the ground?
or would you reach out your hands to help me up?
would you ignore my presence, my existance?
or would you still guide me through and bring joy to my life?
i'd like to know, i'd really like to know.

xoxo
hanisah

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7:53 AM

Sunday, April 06, 2008

another hour to the end of our extended I Love You week.
so sad, cause my mood was obviously down throughout the whole week except monday (thanks alyssaaaaa ((: )

this week was an exceptionally challenging one.
i've been put on a test in many ways.
strength of perseverance, strength of faith, strength of patience, strength of emotion, strength of will, strength of mind.
though i doubt its coming to an end today, but its okay, i'll fight on like a brave fighterrrrrrrr

okay i dont think im talking bout anth tt's beneficial now. i have to write around 400 word long testimonials each for RHN, AMR and SNA SR. but i dont even know how to start.

SAY HELLO TO AN AWESOMEEEE WEEK AHEAD!
(sarcasm)

oh. tmr's gonna be our last day for angklung though. dont know if i should feel good or sad. but it has like been a part of me, since the last 4 yrs. if i ever wanna be part of angklung ensemble agn, i must really work hard to go nj. i hope. i'll update bout it soon. yeah.

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
8:03 AM

Saturday, April 05, 2008

take me for who i am

oh wow. i realised i havent blogged for a week. (the -you you you you you- post doesnt count though.)
im supp to be studying/doing my work or anth of tt sort, but im terribly upset i cant go for nj drama today (when the whole world is like going for it). fine, not the whole world. but i feel so left out. BOO. i feel like a spoilt brat. but its okay. to make up for tt, i shall write a longgg post today(now)!

ok i dunno where to start. this week has been bad and i refuse to elaborate any further. my tolerance level couldnt get any higher this week.

road run wasnt tt bad. good even, cause we missed emath. i have the wackiest class chairperson ever. she walked around the sch throughout the whole day barefooted. and she was trying to be the gay wedding planner. (with her scratchy gay voice) we were laughing so hard even our toes laughed along.
taka after sch for lunch; realised tt we're so deprived. havent been going anywhere much except lotone :/
night study in sch at night (DUH). was awesome, me and partner loved it belly much. then there was a trigger factor which made me so happy. had impromtu amath, with ms chua, nadhirah, dhanu, and of course partner and me. left sch at 8 plus, nat and sharah were star gazing. the sch is rly beautiful at night; reminds me of mly camps. ):
walked to redhill, agn it was rly nice. reached home at 9 plus, bathed and totally conked out. oh, grandaunt slept over (:

okay, i cant rmb much tt happened this week. cause my mood was quite terrible. only rmb being pissed every single day. HAHA. oh. the donation thing. they collected it back, i used my money to donate, dont know what name to put. so i ended up putting down Clover Lim! haha so retarded.

OH. i was torn as to whether i should go for the malaysia field trip or adam khoo's workshop. cause both events clash you see. and i rly wanna go for both. but, i think. i've decided to go for the adam khoo's workshop.

gosh yeah. 2.4. i improved by 40s! haha okay not so good but its okay. i havent been actively involved in sports for so long now, but i realised there's a main factor as to how i could keep up my stamina. so easy. here's a tip for you ppl out there:
come late to sch! hahah. reach redhill at 7.10 everyday, without fail. then walk by the back route. not just walk, but brisk-walk. then you have to climb up the stairs of the bridge fast. then walk faster from the bridge to the sch gate. when you're halfway to the hall/parade sq, run/jog. (so as to reach the hall/parade sq at 7.19)
there! haha our usual morn routine. rly helps the leg muscles you know :D

and and i have my invisible 'motivator' running with me by my side! xD yay i love you my dearest motivator! *HUGS*

mr m told us abt our prom night. its gonna be on 17/11/08 people!!!! haha rename's used-to-be donut day and of course, our drama production date (a year ago) !!!! but its so scary how time flies. i think we're too comfortable in our comfort zone tt we dont wanna go out of it. which is sad. i dont wanna leave everything behind and start anew. my batch's too awesome to be true.

ok this post is quite long, though sadly not as long as i wanted it to be. and oh no! five mins to five=start of nj drama D:
okay, im back to a sad kiddo again.

(oh, and im the kind who rly hates to shareeeeeee ): i sound like a bitch but its true. but no, its okay. i dont mind sharing my food with ppl though :DD spread the love for the food!!)

xoxo
hanisah

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12:45 AM

Thursday, April 03, 2008

You.
You.
You.
You.
You.

APPLES!
11:06 AM

welcome

Church;

Dear Angel;

her.

what she wants.

what she loves.

things we wanna do after O's.

tagboard

exits

links

archives

thankyous